I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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