Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I will die if light touches me.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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