I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize