hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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