that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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