Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize