Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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