dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You need Xanax blowdarts
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize