I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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