I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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