that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize