no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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