btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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