Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Are my feet made of real feet?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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