would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize