Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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