just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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