Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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