Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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