I am puke
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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