never play flip cup with pint glasses
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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