:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize