I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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