the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize