yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
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How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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