He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
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