haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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