I think I won the penis lottery.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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