I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize