i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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