I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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