He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize