Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize