never play flip cup with pint glasses
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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