these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize