didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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