Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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