even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
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There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
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I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
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