I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
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