I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize