Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize