You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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