Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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