I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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