Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
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no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
FUCK WHALES
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