Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize