I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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