he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize