i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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