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  • Submitted by sailor_man on Feb 4, 12 at 10:05am

    Why wouldn't you just penis blast her?

  • Submitted by CapnArt on Feb 4, 12 at 10:46am

    I bet she'd rather you ate her out!!

  • 89 57
    Submitted by yewinnhard on Feb 4, 12 at 3:43pm

    Guys often underestimate the power of a good finger.

  • 80 40
    Submitted by sevensevenseven on Feb 4, 12 at 12:53pm

    I'm gonna finger bang bang you into my life...

  • 78 56
    Submitted by judyfinkel89 on Feb 4, 12 at 3:54pm

    Best boss ever...

  • 58 37
    Submitted by sharkslayer11 on Feb 4, 12 at 5:38pm

    This is almost better they tosh.0's "I'm gonna tongue punch your mother's fart box"

  • 53 40
    Submitted by Sawadeechick on Feb 5, 12 at 1:41pm

    Anyone else assume that maybe the OP wasn't a male...?

  • 51 36
    Submitted by lizette326 on Feb 4, 12 at 11:18pm

    Best text I've seen in a long time.

  • 53 53
    Submitted by Shan5 on Feb 5, 12 at 1:11am

    I agree with sailor man

  • 47 42
    Submitted by hogfish on Feb 4, 12 at 3:03pm

    Ah, Lance romance you say the sweetest things

  • 60 68
    Submitted by ojg15 on Feb 4, 12 at 10:30am

    If she has a job, she's too old for that bullshit.

  • 50 54
    Submitted by Scho_nuff on Feb 4, 12 at 9:48am

    Oh yeah well I'll use my magic force field to block it and shoot it back at you

  • 27 18
    Submitted by tiffanylikespie on Mar 30, 13 at 5:16pm

    I wish

  • 45 56
    Submitted by GA_Peach on Feb 5, 12 at 5:12am

    Dun dun da dun fingerblast! The strongest weapon Captian XY Finger has in his pleasurific arsenal. Get ready.

  • 41 52
    Submitted by yumyum05 on Feb 4, 12 at 10:08am

    why does that sound so painful to me? *pass*

  • 39 64
    Submitted by Sixlets on Feb 4, 12 at 2:36pm

    Mohave County = Lame

    • 36 44
      Submitted by andrewMedium on Feb 4, 12 at 11:50pm

      Coconino to be exact. :]