Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
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I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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